so today is my birthday. i don’t feel any different from yesterday. age (a number) is an amount, a quantity, an accumulation of time and ephemeral memories that only gain its significance when it has past, when it existed and ceased to exist. today is just a mark in time, the beginning and end of another loop. and i am the artefact, a piece of history, a containment of 20 (21?) full years of memories and time past and most forgotten. full of burden (21 years!) but also of the lightness of the unknown ahead of me.

-

i have rambled myself into a corner.

truman.
you can speak. i can hear you.

who are you?

i am the Creator
of a television show
that gives hope and joy
and inspiration to millions.

then who am i?

you’re the star.

was nothing real?

you were real
that’s what makes you so good to watch.

listen to me truman.
there’s no more truth out there
than in the world i created for you.
the same lies
the same deceit.

but in my world
you have nothing to fear.
i know you better
than you know yourself.

you never had a camera in my head.

-

//how is it that this movie lost to shakespeare in love at the ‘99 oscars?!